Quit worrying about what they think!!

I have been working hard on accepting myself for who I truly am. Yes, like everyone I have some kinks in my life that I am still trying to untangle. However, I cannot wait until everything is “perfectly aligned” in my life to be genuinely happy. That is something that has to happen today.

It might sound silly, but I know a lot of people who struggle with the idea of ACCEPTANCE and APPROVAL.

ac·cept·ance (n): the action or process of being received as adequate or suitable, typically to be admitted into a group.

ap·prov·al (n): the action of officially agreeing to something or accepting something as satisfactory.

If there is one thing I have always noticed about myself (and have actually been called out on recently), it is the need to constantly explain myself to other people. My ideas, my intentions, my thoughts, my actions… you name it, I explain it (haha). I believe I do that because I am subconsciously seeking approval from someone other than myself.

This behavior of constant explanation for approval is not only exhausting, but it probably is not very good for our health.

You seek acceptance to get approval, to ultimately feel good or happy about a decision you want to make, or an action you desire to pursue.

However, in seeking that approval, you may find yourself anxious or stressed out about what the reaction of the other person may be. Will they think your decision is good or bad? Will they call you smart or crazy? Do they agree or disagree with you?… Are you picking up what I am throwing down?! 😉

My point in all of this is, does it really matter what they think? Does their personal input/opinion truly weigh so heavily on your desire to follow through with a thought/action, that you would actually change your mind to be accepted by them?

For so long, the answer to that question for me personally was: YES. I cared so much about getting the approval of others, that I would actually change my course of action, or stop my desire to try something, if it was not seen as acceptable in the eyes of others.

Honestly, that behavior did NOTHING positive for me at all. What it did do was stress me out, make me unhappy, and make me miss out on various opportunities that I could have been enjoying.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. There are no coincidences.

Whether it is physically being somewhere, having a certain thought, meeting different people, etc. I think those experiences are happening because you are truly meant to be having them.

My challenge – to myself and others – is this:
Listen to yourself. Follow your intuition. Act on your desires.
BE HAPPY… without the input of others.

Do something for YOU that makes YOU happy, because YOU want to do it… every day!

If people think it is strange, who cares?!
If people look at you like you are crazy, Good!

TinyFey

Follow your heart and open your mind and spirit to all of the things that you truly want out of life. Life is too short to be wasting your time worrying about what other people think of you.

*Disclaimer: I like to believe that I have a good head on my shoulders, so these thoughts, actions, experiences, etc. are all safe and legal (haha). Please do not do anything that could harm yourself or others.

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Don’t be afraid to express your thoughts.

Have you ever had something you want to ask or talk about with someone, but you didn’t know exactly how to approach it?

For example, something is lingering in your mind, clouding your thoughts, but you are afraid to express it because you don’t want to upset anyone, or get them worked up?

I absolutely HATE having to bring up uncomfortable topics and/or having to ask awkward questions… especially when the overall “mood” is positive and happy.

But is the atmosphere truly happy when there is something so deeply weighing on your mind?

Keeping thoughts and questions to yourself, when they are truly bothering you, is an easy way to avoid confrontation. You hold on to the thoughts, in hopes that you they will just magically go away, or you will find some creative way to ignore them. However, what good does that do for you when there are unexpressed feelings that are weighing you down?

I have been working on trying to be more vocal with my thoughts and feelings lately. Too often in the past, I keep these feelings to myself- and they just end up “eating away” at me emotionally. I have kept deep thoughts internalized, and it does nothing but make me sad, upset, crabby, etc.

I have learned that although addressing certain things may be “uncomfortable” or “awkward” initially, they generally get sorted out and better understood once they are laid out in the open.

Open communication between people you care about – family, friends, significant others, etc. – is key to maintaining happy, healthy relationships. If you cannot be honest and open with them, you probably won’t be with anyone else.

It is not always easy for me, but for my own well being and “peace of mind” I need to be able to step away from my comfort zone at times and speak up when something is on my mind.
Express Your Feelings

Living in the Present Moment

I LOVE yoga. I love the beauty of the practice, I love the serenity in the meditation, I just love everything about it! Anyone who practices, knows that there are a couple of things that are highly emphasized…

1. The Breath
2. Being present in the moment

There is something to be said about the feeling of “being truly present in the moment”. In today’s world, people always seem to be preoccupied with “WHAT’S NEXT?!” in their lives. Whether it be projects at work, things going on at home, never ending to-do lists, etc. people easily lose sight of what is happening at the current moment in order to be more focused on what’s to come… I am [VERY] guilty of this too.

I often find myself thinking about the future (future meaning any time beyond right now, haha). If I am getting ready for work, I am thinking about my evening plans. If I am relaxing at home at night, I am thinking about the weekend. I think about the summer during the winter months, I think about my life in 1, 2, 5, 10, 20 years from now… you get the point.

What I am beginning to wonder is WHY? What is the rush to get to “WHAT’S NEXT” in life?
Call it goofy, corny, cliché, whatever… but I am starting to realize that being more focused, and present in the moment may really change my outlook on things. Life is so short, and all of this time spent thinking about what is going to happen in the future is time wasted on what is happening right NOW.

I am blessed in so many ways, and I hate to admit it, but I think these everyday blessings are often overlooked because I am too focused on what is going to happen next. Although my daily tasks might not be all that exciting, I need to start looking at the simple pleasures that come along with my routine and enjoying each and every day for what it is.

I am thankful for…

  • Finding my true faith and having a wholesome relationship with God
  • Being blessed to have Joe in my life to love
  • Rescuing two healthy, happy puppies and knowing that we are giving them a great life
  • My wonderful, loving family and great friends
  • My career with PTI
  • My healthy body, that allows me to enjoy life and can help me accomplish any goals/dreams
  • Owning my own house
  • Etc….

Taking a moment to sit back and realize how much I have to be thankful for, makes me realize that there is no rush to get into the “next best thing”.  Whether it be enjoying a walk with my puppies, my commute to work, my “homemade” dinners with Joe, visiting with my loved ones, etc. I am going to make a conscious effort to take each day and look at the beauty in whatever it is that I am doing.
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(Please note, I understand that it is important to plan and think about the future. I am simply suggesting that it is equally important to look at the life you are currently living, and enjoying it to its full potential. You don’t want to miss the great things going on around you right now!)